The Trial

Sometimes I can't feel God's presence. I find myself crying in my room. Praying to God yet nothing happens. I asked God why? 


This happened when I realized that everything is falling apart and it's me the last one standing. I hoped that everything worked out yet nothing happened. I remembered asking God to help me pass the exam that I reviewed hard because I really have to pass that test. But nothing happened instead I still fail. Locked myself in my room crying and asking God why is that? Is that me not attending the Church or not praying anymore?


Cried myself to sleep. The next morning as I wake up. I opened my Bible to start my daily devotion. There I find what God wanted me to learn. Sometimes God intended us not to feel Him because He knows that we will look for Him. God wanted us to look for Him because in that way He can prove that we really love Him.  I can't remember the exact Bible verse and who the person mentioned in the Bible. But he said that he can't find God everywhere. Now I know. As I read my devotion His doing it so he can make us draw closer to Him. He wanted us to seek Him more because He is our father and He love us. 


He knew that we often forget Him. So He intended to isolate His presence to us( just the presence that we can feel from Him but His still with us) so we can look for Him more. It was a test for every Christian. No one is exempted in this kind of test. God really intend it even priest, pastors, church goers can feel it. And it's part of God's plan so we must trust Him more during those times because that's what God wanted us to do. 


Now every time I feel God is not around I'm confident. I trust Him. I know His just watching me how to respond to that. I know through that my faith to Him is being tested. I won't give up.